Actor's Journal #2 - something different

090109

Walk in today to drama feeling more brave. Teachers know my name, I'm SUPPOSED to be there and classmates seem nice enough to feel less awkward.

FEELINGS : Not awkward. Nice. Happy. Learning new stuff. Interesting.

WRONG. Today was just another nervous day. Nervous but comfortable though, might I add.

Well today I guess I'm happy because I'm not the last one to enter class. YES. Things like that make me uneasy in new environments. Not in my old school or places I am familiar with. But new places, like Uplands, my NEW school. So happily I await the new knowledge I am about to absorb and obtain from these interesting teachers of mine, Mr. Moss & Ms. Marshall (she's from Cambodia! cool!) We start off by doing quick revision on yesterdays work. Physical character? determined by history & choice. We sit on the floor doing this quick activity when Mr. Moss asks us to look at the back of the room. There is an annoying piece of furniture infront of me. The table. I start to move it when Mr. Moss says "ah ah. nono. that is part of the setup." Then I knew. Oopsy, that is the stage, and we're acting today. *heartdrops* I like to act yes, BUT ACTING IS NOT SOMETHING I'M EXTREMELY GOOD AT. Thats why I went for theatre arts. To be good at it! My gooooshes.

So Mr. Moss explains the set-up. It is a classroom, and we, NEW STUDENTS (hahaha. not like I need to act yes?) are entering it for the FIRST TIME. act that out, while everyone else watches. *heart thumping* ok. I can do it. Its natural, the nervousness kicks in rreal well. Lucky I'm the last to go, cause if not. I would definitely mess it up more than I already did. So after each one of us took turns acting it out (I acted scared btw, Michelle did an awesome comical one!! go michelle!!) Mr. Moss asks us : Do you know what dominant and subservient people are?

Subservient. Hmmm.....heard of it. Never bothered to check its meaning. GUESS : opposite of dominant? (lol. that is quite obvious)

So he starts handing out papers with a list of numbers (2-10) describing people's character on the level of confidence. 2 being extremely subservient and 10 being extremely dominant. I looked at the paper and KNEW we had to act at least one out. Next thing I knew, we were all drawing numbers from this tupperware. The numbers picked we were supposed to act out. Not sharing the knowledge of whatever number we got, we act it out, people will watch and an appointed person will guess the number we are acting while giving comments and thoughts. I got 7! which is cool but hard cause confidence kind of goes against that nervousness that is ALWAYS there heck! everytime I do things infront of foreign people. Tilly is up first with Michelle guessing. To me she acts skitterish. Being excited constantly and jumpy a little. For me I wouldn't say its confidence, but then again, do people act like that in a new class on the first day of school? Nono. So I guess a substantial amount of confidence will definitely be needed to actually go up and say hi to people. Michelle actually guess correctly! An 8! bravo! So Michelle is up next, with ME commenting. oooOOOOoo....butterflies. She acts comfortable. So thats a 6 and above. She acknowledges people. DEFINITE 7 and above. Not much nerves. No trepidation. Gotta be a 7. But wait, I'm 7!!! I guess a 9. and it is correct. Luck. pure luck. I wasn't even SURE of my answer. *sighs* maybe next lesson then.

THEN its MY turn. >_< I walk on set. shaking off those nerves. shake shake shake. okk....obviously not that easy to shake. but I begin anyway. *thinking* poise. arrogance. confidence. bravery. confidence. With all the thoughts in mind. I walk, letting the energy fill me. But then I feel stiff, I wave at people, I acknowledge them. check. I make eye contact. Check. Limited eye contact? My eyes flicker over the teacher when he looks at me. Was that correct? I don't know. Then I slither to the lone chair and desk in the "room" sit down once again, arrogantly, and wait. Mark guesses a 6. HAHA WRONG. but oh wait. people are supposed to guess correctly. SHIT. But he said he was contemplating between a 7 and a 6. DAMMIT WHY DIDN'T U SAY A 6?! but oh well.....lesson learnt. CONFIDENT PPL DO NOT SLITHER. they refuse slight eye contact but STILL the confidence is there. *sighs* acting makes me timid sometimes. Well, basically the rest did good. I like a little bit of everything from everyone. I like Mark's shuffling of feet. I like Poo's overall act. I like Trim's (is that his name?) tense feet when he sat down on the chair and I LOVE Lucy's ACTING. she has already graduated....but that doesn't mean I cant love her acting can i?

So once again, I learn tons. I love that feeling, like a sponge plunging into a bucket of soapy water. Just soaking in all that, now all I wait to do is use the soap and water inside me to clean SOMETHING. I wanna be productive! I wanna show them I learnt something. Thats why....I wanna do my best in my speech thats gonna be presented on Tues. Dear God, help me not screw it up because when I chose the number that I thought I would find difficulty in portraying, I chose 8. SHITHECKDAMNPOOP.

Assignment:
Choose a number that you find difficulty in portraying.
Now make a speech entitled "My most inspiring character/person" in the character of the number you chose.

AHHA. challenge. I will not give up. Yes I will do it. Now let me go find my inspiration.........

ciaoz
Bug